Word of God, Word of Joy - A sermon for Epiphany 3

Epiphany 3

January 27, 2013

Nehemiah 8:1-3, 5-6, 8-10

If you were to watch any television programs or read any news articles about the City of Detroit in recent years, you would hear that the city is a mess.  The city itself is teetering on bankruptcy from years of bad politics and people leaving the city in droves.  There are neighborhoods where fires break out and no one seems to care because the homes affected are all abandoned and dilapidated.  In fact, if you were to drive through some neighborhoods in Detroit, you might wonder why all of a sudden you were in a ghost town when you intended to travel to the home of Motown, the Motor City.  One journalist from Time Magazine has even said that if you were to look at the city, you would think that a natural disaster had hit on the scale of Hurricane Katrina.  But in the midst of the abandoned homes and businesses and the general state of disrepair of the city, there is a glimmer of hope….a renaissance of sorts is occurring in Detroit.  Young adults who grew up in this area are returning to the city bringing their art, their music, their culinary skills, and their passion to see one of the greatest cities in America make a comeback.

This is the image that I have when I think of the state of the city of Jerusalem when Nehemiah, Ezra and their people return from exile.  Nehemiah was granted permission to go on this journey by King Atraxerxes of Persia after he learned that the walls of the city of Jerusalem had been destroyed and the city had been torn apart.  Nehemiah was working as the King’s cupbearer at the time and when news of the destruction of the walls of Jerusalem came, he knew he had to do something.  Nehemiah had probably never lived in Jerusalem, but it was still home.  It was the place that God had given to Nehemiah’s ancestors…and Nehemiah felt called to return to the Holy city and rebuild it.  And rebuild they did.  When he received permission from the King to go to Jerusalem, Nehemiah assembled a traveling party and after the 500 mile journey from Susa, in what is now Iran, to Jerusalem, Nehemiah led the people in rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem and in the restoration of the gates around the city.  This project was completed in 52 days, even in the midst of some interference from enemies who lived around Jerusalem.

But rebuilding the city wasn’t enough, Nehemiah also felt that the people needed assistance to get back on the straight and narrow in the eyes of God.  He saw how the people had strayed from the laws of Moses and had disobeyed God’s commandments and so he assisted the priest Ezra in setting up a revival of sorts.

On the first day of the 7^th month, which is now Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, the people of Jerusalem gathered together by the Water Gate, which was one of the places where there were no restrictions on who could be there…men, women, children, those who were ritually unclean could all be in this place together.  The people had made a request that Ezra bring with him the book of the law of Moses.  And so, for about six hours, Ezra read from the Torah while the Levites circulated through the crowd and helped the people to understand what was being spoken to them from scripture.  The people listened intently for those six hours, and many of them began to weep and become distressed.  We don’t know exactly what part of the law was read in those six hours, but it was something that really hit home with the people who were gathered together that day.  In the reading of the law, there was a realization of just how far separated the people were from God. 

But in the midst of their despair, Ezra won’t have any of the sadness.  It is a time of renewal and rebuilding…a time of reconnecting with God.  It is not a time to mourn or be distressed, for there is so much going on around them that is new.  Instead it is time for them to rejoice because of the renewal and rebuilding and reconnection with God.  So go, eat the fat, drink sweet wine and celebrate that God is giving us a chance at something new.  And we see this in the reading of the Torah, God’s gift to the people. 

In the Torah we find God’s word…yes in the Torah there are laws…but also contained within the Torah are the stories of God’s promises to the people and how God has made good on those promises.  We hear the stories of Abraham and Noah, of Joseph and of Moses, how God was faithful to the promises that God made. But even more than that, we hear in the Torah of God’s faithfulness to the people and willingness to give second chances even when the people were unfaithful.  Adam and Eve ate the fruit from the one tree that they were told not to touch, but God remained faithful and protected them.  Cain killed his brother out of jealousy and God remained faithful and protected him from retribution.  The people in the wilderness turned to a golden calf, but God remained faithful. Much like when a child disobeys a parent, there have been consequences when we have disobeyed God…but God has remained faithful and loving…so much so that God brought his word into our realm and made it flesh in the person of Jesus Christ. 

In Jesus we see God’s word and God’s faithfulness in action…giving sight to the blind, setting the captives free, healing the lame…and giving of himself in our places so that we could have a clean slate and the chance to live in a reconnected and renewed relationship with our God. And throughout it all, God has never tried to force us to follow orders or demanded that we do anything to receive God’s love…instead God gives and gives and gives, waiting for us to make up our own minds as to how to respond.    

When we hear the words “the law” in relation to scripture, particularly in the first five books of the bible which make up the Torah, it’s easy to think only of the things that we should and should not do…and when we screw up on one of those items, it can be easy for guilt to set in.  But the word of God contained in the law of Moses, which was fulfilled in the Word made flesh, are words of promise and of renewal.  There are reminders that God rejoices in God’s creation.  There are reminders that our God makes good on his promises.  And there is joy which comes from the Lord.  A joy which gives us strength in the midst of distressing and despairing times.  A joy which inspires us to live lives as God’s children.  A joy which gives us the passion to renew, rebuild, and reconnect relationships with God and one another. 

Why I preach...a confession

In May, my mentor, Jerry, is retiring.  I met him shortly before I began my seminary journey in 2005 and have been grateful for everything he has taught me in the past 7.5 years that I have known him (amazing how time flies!).  But there is one thing that he said to me once that will stick with me more than anything else.  And it has to do with preaching.

If I recall correctly, in the fall of 2009 I was lamenting a preaching issue I was having and was looking for the best way to address it.  When I brought the issue to him, he told me that as preachers, we can only do half the work.  The Holy Spirit takes care of the rest.  Assuming that we do more than half the work is egotistical and doesn't rely on God's grace.

He is right.  And each time I sit down to write a sermon, I do my best to remind myself of this. 

As a preacher, I need God's grace and the Holy Spirit's presence in order to do what I do.  Because not every sermon is going to be as polished as I would like it to be. Not every week is going to allow for the optimal amount of preparation that I was taught is necessary.  Sometimes, I'm just as confused by the scripture texts as everyone else...sometimes more so after I've taken notes on the text, worked with the Greek (this doesn't always happen), and read the commentaries.  Sometimes, I get so frustrated waiting on the Spirit to nudge me in the direction that I'm supposed to go that I have to walk away for at least 24 hours before I can approach the text again.

So why preach?  I don't preach for me.  I don't preach because it puts me in the spotlight.  I don't preach to make people happy...sometimes we need to be made to feel uncomfortable if we're really going to get what God is saying.  Sometimes the Gospel is downright offensive. If the Gospel was all warm and fuzzy, and never offensive, the religious leaders wouldn't have wanted Jesus dead.  Jesus didn't come to make us feel better, Jesus came to wake us up to the reality of God in the world, especially in the places that we tend to ignore.   That being said, I do not preach to offend.  Instead, I preach the reality of God in the world...and sometimes the reality of God is messy simply because it is real. 

But this doesn't answer the question of why I DO preach.  I preach because I know and have experienced God's Good News in the world and I want to share that with others.  I preach because God's grace has met me where I am, flawed and imperfect and growing.  I preach because, no matter the circumstances, the Holy Spirit comes through each and every time.  I preach because the Holy Spirit won't let me get away with not preaching.  I preach because I know that the Holy Spirit is at work in the Word of God and in the Sacraments. 

In the end, God's work is going to get done despite and in spite of anything I do or say.  Each time I step into the pulpit, I pray for God's abundant grace.  And each time I step down from the pulpit, I am grateful to know that God has taken over and done amazing things...even though my part wasn't perfect.

Looking back on 2012, a health goals progress report

Last year, I set some health goals for myself. 

#1 - Plan out menus and stick to them.
#2- Only buy what's on my grocery list.
#3- Actually eat the fruit and vegetables that I buy.
#4 - Take my vitamins
#5 - Exercise

I started out really well.  I had some folks step up as accountability partners who kept me moving and I was on the right path.  Then I fell off the wagon, as often happens when things get busy around Lent/Easter...but was still doing better than I was before I set the health goals.  In June, I started working with a trainer and was doing amazing. I lost some weight, my "circumference" (for lack of a better term" were going down...if I remember right, I lost 1 inch off my thighs and .75 inches from my waist...I was doing amazing.

Then came the big fat positive in early August...Look out world! The Kiefer's are gonna be parents...

Since then, my health goals have been focused on keeping myself healthy while growing a healthy baby.  I still work with my trainer, but with a focus on keeping my body from getting out of whack posture wise and keeping myself strong while my tummy gets bigger and bigger.  My goal to actually eat the fruit and veggies I buy has been super easy to keep, they've been my big cravings...especially apples and pineapple...and tomatoes (I actually paid $3 for 1 beautiful, pink, heirloom tomato I found at the Merc the other week...totally worth every penny, if you ask me).  I've also been a faithful pre-natal vitamin taker...and water and milk drinker.

Here's where it's harder: I will admit (forgive me Manon!) that I don't exercise as many days a week as I should...on the days I don't, I sleep instead because that's what my body is telling me to do.  Also, grocery shopping in the midst of food cravings is tough! But I've figured out that if I go right after I've had a meal or a good snack, I stick to my list a lot better than I do if I'm hungry (hungry is hard enough in the grocery store...pregnancy hormones AND hungry = lost cause).  I also do a lot better at sticking to my list when I'm by myself...my husband enables my cravings.  Last week he bought "the baby" some Little Debbie Swiss Rolls (Tip: "it's for the baby" is code for things we want).  I've mandated he come with me from now on, though, because bending over to retrieve things from the shopping cart is becoming increasingly difficult (and apparently, some grocery store cashiers have little patience for slow retrieval of items at the bottom of the cart...long story).   

One addition: Pray more.  This happened naturally.  I'm not necessarily one who sets aside a certain amount of time to pray, but I do pray constantly throughout the day, depending on what's going on.  But since I started feeling jellybean move around, I've spent more quiet time marveling in my little acrobat/tae kwon do superstar/yoga master (depending on the day) and praying. It's become our daily ritual, and I love it.  

The moral of the story is this -  Life sends us on little detours, but in them we can still accomplish our goals.  I may not have reached my ideal weight...and it may take a bit to get there after Jellybean arrives...but I've decided to care less about that and more about staying as healthy as I can.  In the end, that's the most important thing.     

     

My top 10 of 2012

One of my goals this year was to increase the amount of reading that I have done.  And I actually accomplished it!!  I actually more than read enough books to create a top 10 list for the year! Here's my list:

10) Christian Worship by Gail Ramshaw
I will admit that I read this as part of a conversation with the Worship and Music committee at church, but it was a good re-cap of what I learned in my liturgy classes in seminary.  Definitely an introductory text, as is stated in the intro to the book, but good none the less. 

9) God is Not Great, by Christopher Hitchens
A pastor reading atheist writings? what?  Well, I'm not the first and won't be the last.  It's always good to get some perspective from those who vehemently disagree with you about the notion of God and faith.  And though I struggled a lot with Hitchen's arguments and disagreed with his practice of taking only the most offensive parts that the religious world has to offer and using them as his proofs for why Religion spoils things, I did appreciate his view point, none the less.  If you want to get a good perspective on how someone from outside the faith realm views religious folks, this is a good place to start. 

8) Out of Oz, by Gregory Maguire
This is the last of the now four part Wicked series.  I found it my least favorite and the slowest going of all four books.  I am tempted to give it another chance, though, after watching the Wizard of Oz and wondering in my mind what Maguire had in mind in sending Dorothy back to Oz.

7) A Lion among Men, by Gregory Maguire
I really liked hearing this tail about the Cowardly Lion.  Getting to hear the Wizard of Oz account from his perspective...plus some other parts of his own story, was really interesting. 

6) Son of a Witch, by Gregory Maguire
What if the wicked witch had a son?  What would he be like? I enjoyed the ups and downs and adventure and intrigue in this book.  It was a good follow up to Wicked.

5) Wicked, by Gregory Maguire
As usual, the original book in a series was the best.  I didn't get through it as fast as I wanted to, but it was a really good read.  Definitely one to go back to at some point now that I've read the other three books in the series.

4) Mockingjay, by Suzanne Collins
Good ending to the trilogy.  Wish it hadn't been as violent at the end as it was, but in the end it turned out ok. I'm interested to see what they do with this in movie form.

3) Catching Fire, by Suzanne Collins
Couldn't put the book down and then was super disappointed that it was a cliff hanger (though I suppose she needed some way to get folks to by the third book!).  As with the first book, I saw a thread of social commentary running through it that I found quite interesting.

2) The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins
Got hooked in to this book right away.  Some interesting social commentary on rich vs. poor...dominant political party vs the rest of us.  The movie wasn't nearly as good, but it helped to visualize what Collins wrote about.  

1) The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, by Rebecca Skloot
LOVED, loved, loved, loved, loved, this book.  It was the perfect book for someone like me who has an interest in the biological sciences and in history. Skloot did a great job of weaving in the medical history behind the He-la cell line and cancer research with the story of Henrietta Lacks, her family, and Skloot's adventure to uncover the real story about who Henrietta Lacks was.  Highly recommend this book.

I'm currently in progress with The Hobbit and am enjoying it very much.  Then I will move on to "The Paris Wife."

On my shelf for 2013:
A Wrinkle in Time (How did I never read this as a kid?)
Accompany Them with Singing, by Tom Long(I WILL finally finish this!)
The Testament by John Grisham
Lots of children's books :)

A Sermon for Christmas 1

Christmas 1

December 30, 2012

Luke 2:41-52, I Samuel 2:18-20, 26

Shelly was a fighter.  Not in the literal way, she wasn’t a boxer or an MMA fighter or anything.  However, she did spend a good portion of her life fighting herself and those around her, and fighting with God.  You see, at a young age, Shelly had come to a decision on how her life was supposed to be and what path she was going to take.  She was going to go to said college, then she would go to a particular law school, become an intern at a specific law firm and work her way up the ladder and be very successful in her field.  She would be married by 25, have 4 children and 2 dogs by 35, and live a very happy life. 

Shelly’s family didn’t quite see it that way.  They thought that Shelly should get a teaching degree.  It was what all the women in Shelly’s family did.  She was supposed to marry that nice pre-med student that she dated her sophomore year in college and 3 kids were enough, no dogs, dogs are too much work.  And her family made no qualms about letting her know that this was what she was expected to do. 

But God had even different plans for Shelly.  When she was a young girl, God had called her into ministry to be with people in their time of need.  As a child, her neighbors could always count on her to stop by with a homemade get well card when they were sick, and as she got older the cards would be accompanied by cookies or other care packages that she had crafted herself.  She had a knack for knowing who needed what when.  When her college roommates needed a shoulder to cry on, it was Shelly who would be there first.  She was always the first to drop of chicken soup, the first to give out a hug, the first to let you know that she was there for you and that she genuinely cared for you and your situation. 

And she was miserable, she didn’t get the grades she needed to get into the law school of her choice…she didn’t into any law school, as a matter of fact.  But she fought it, it was what she thought she wanted to do…should could get a masters degree and try again in two years…but why was it making her so unhappy?   

Then one day during the semester before graduation, she had a meeting with her advisor who had known her since freshman year.  Shelly’s advisor knew her grades in the science department were excellent and that her caring nature would make her the perfect candidate to become a nurse.  They argued over it for about 15 minutes before the advisor finally said “will you put down the boxing gloves and let life take you where you’re supposed to go?”

Shelly listened.  She struggled, but eventually she let go and let God lead her.  And God led her to nursing school and she became a hospice nurse.  For the most part, life fell into place after that and Shelly was no longer unhappy. 

Shelly’s story is not real, but it’s not made up either.  There are a lot of people in our families, in our social circles, in our congregations, who are fighting against something.  And I know from my own personal experience that spending even a small portion of your life fighting against something is exhausting. 

Now, there are the good fights, the fights against wrong doing and injustice that work to make this world a better place.  Those fights have a tendency to energize and fire folks up for the work that needs to be done.  But I’m talking about the personal fights, against who God has called us to be, those are the ones that are tiring and have the potential to make us miserable. 

Our buddy, Martin Luther, fought this fight against his father.  Hans Luther wanted, no, expected that his son would become a lawyer.  When Martin left law school to become a priest, this was seen by his father as a slap in his face and the greatest dishonor that Martin could have put upon his parents.  But, despite this and his own struggles with his sin and the devil, Martin knew that his call into the priesthood was a call from God, for better or for worse, though he probably didn’t know at the time that he became a priest that his call would eventually spark the Reformation.

It can be easy for us to walk through life thinking that we know the exact path that we are supposed to take, that we are in control of whatever life has in store for us.  But when this happens, we can stray from the path that God has laid out for us.  Because of our free will, we are able to do this…but it doesn’t always lead to the best outcome.  It’s when we listen to God’s leading and nudging, that things often go the smoothest.  There are other times, though, when it seems that we are totally lost with no idea where we are headed…after all, not all of us get caught in a lightning storm like Luther did, or get blinded like Paul.  And it can get frustrating…but maybe it’s not time for the call yet…or maybe other things around us distract us from the path we’re supposed to head in.  And that’s ok.  We’re not all called at the same time and in the same way.  Just take Samuel and Jesus for example. 

God called Samuel early on in his life.  In fact, his mother Hannah heard God’s call for Samuel before he was even born.  As soon as Samuel was weaned, Hannah brought him to the temple in order that he might minister in the temple.  And as he grew, Samuel proved himself to be a worthy servant of God, growing in wisdom and insight as he worked with Eli.  I wonder if folks in Hannah and Elkanah’s neighborhood questioned the practical wisdom of giving their first born son over to the temple.  Wouldn’t it have been more practical to raise their son themselves so he could help them with the household chores, and learn Elkanah’s profession so he could take it over one day?  But as it was, Hannah and Elkanah listened to God’s voice rather than the voices of the neighbors, and things turned out just fine. 

Jesus also knew his call early on.  In our gospel text this morning, at age 12, which was considered to be near adulthood at that time, Jesus was found by a very worried Mary and Joseph in the temple where he had been so caught up speaking to the teachers in the temple and asking them questions that he wound up missing the traveling group going back to Nazareth.  It seems that in Jesus’ case, he knew his calling better than Mary and Joseph did…and this is easy to see since he is the Son of God, after all.  But I wonder if at dinners and other such events, it was discussed between the adults that Jesus should have just focused on becoming a craftsman like his father.  I wonder if there was any conversation about arranging a marriage for Jesus to a young woman in town.  Where there certain things that the folks in town, maybe even his parents as well, expected from him as a fully human young adult?  What if Mary and Joseph decided it may have been best for Jesus to stay in the temple for a bit longer and learn (and teach) the teachers, and the neighbors scoffed at them for that? But as it was, Jesus knew the mission that God had sent him to earth to carry out at a young age, and like Samuel, he grew in wisdom and insight as he grew. 

And even as the townsfolk rejected him during his years of ministry, Jesus carried out the mission and the ministry that he was sent to do.  To free people from the bonds that shackle them so that they could be free to live and to walk the path that God had set out for them, regardless of when or how the call comes. 

Jesus carried out his mission by dying on the cross and rising from the dead so that we could be free from the sin that binds so in order to live out the callings that God has for us, be it in our home life or our work life or the parts of life in between.  And he did so without the shoulds and shouldn’ts that have a tendency to weigh us down and load us up with guilt over what we have done and what we have failed to do, where we’ve succeeded and where we have messed up.  We are free to put down the boxing gloves, and live.  We are free to stop worrying if our life is measuring up to others expectations, and live.  We are free to stop beating ourselves up over meeting our own personal deadlines, and live.  It’s what God is calling us to do.      

"Pondering..." A sermon for Christmas Eve

December 24, 2012

Christmas Eve

Luke 2:1-20

I have a theory that Mary, the mother of our Lord, was an introvert.  Now scripture never comes out and says this, nor much else about her personality, but we do know one thing.  It is said more than once in the Gospel of Luke that Mary “treasured these things and pondered them in her heart.”  Mary was one to ponder, to process things internally and therefore, I don’t think I’m too far off in thinking that Mary was most likely an introvert.

And there was quite a bit to process in this night. Mary’s birth story was anything but the romantic scenes painted on the faces of nativity sets. It probably wasn’t a clean stable filled with fresh hay, well behaved livestock, or even a nicely made manger.  Mary gave birth to Jesus probably a cave or a barn, no midwife or birthing stool, and commandeered a feeding trough to use as a bed.

And beyond that, there had been a lot to ponder in regards to the events that had transpired the past 40 or so weeks that Mary was pregnant.  First, Mary had been betrothed to a carpenter named Joseph. Then, she is visited by an angel who tells her that she, a virgin, was not only just going to bear a child, but the child she would give birth to would not be the child of her fiancé. On top of all that, Mary is also told that the child would be the long awaited savior of the world. Despite all of this, Mary consents to risking both her life and her marriage in order to carry out the will of our Lord. Consent might be the wrong word for Mary, as we knew she embraced the fact that she would bear God’s son.

We know Mary embraced the responsibility she was given because while visiting her cousin Elizabeth, who was also miraculously pregnant, she sang a beautiful song of praise to God for choosing her to bear God’s son.

That was about forty weeks ago. In the past week, Mary and Joseph had taken a journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem for the Roman census. Normally, it would be a 4 day journey on foot for 2 healthy and non-pregnant individuals, so there was probably a few extra days tacked on there. Like all good family trips, the trip doesn’t exactly go as planned since no one checks with unborn children about when they would like to be born. It may have caught her off guard when the contractions started, her water broke, and any birth plan flew out the window.

To make it more complicated, with literally everyone and their brother in Bethlehem for the census, there were no vacancies in any of the inns in town, so unlike her cousin Elizabeth who probably had a midwife, it was just Mary and Joseph, who most likely hadn’t been present at a childbirth class since at that time being a birthing coach was a job reserved for women, assisting Mary in her labor and delivery of the baby.

However, they find a way to make it work. Mary gives birth to Jesus, wraps him in bands of cloth, and laid him in whatever makeshift bed they could muster. Soon after, a group of random shepherds appeared to Mary and Joseph and told them that they too, had been visited by angels and informed of the Holy nature of this child that had been born and they had to see it for themselves.

All of this would have been a lot to process, but there is so much more for Mary to ponder in the years to come. The implications of giving birth to the Son of God must have weighed heavily, embraced or not. 40 weeks passes by fast, but seems like forever at the same time.

But, we also must not forget about Joseph, and all he had to process as well. Here he is, far from home, alone with Mary who is bearing a child, but not his, but that of God. The social implications, the circumstances of where Mary is giving birth, with probably little knowledge of what it is he had to do to help. The stepfather to God’s son is an awfully big responsibility that Joseph did not get much say in. However, he does what he has to do because that is the kind of person he is.

            We all know the story of how Jesus came into the world, and how complicated things were in their time. A baby by itself is a lot to think about in 40 weeks, but that is what makes this story special. All those pregnancy milestones we take for granted in their time must have been truly amazing. Seeing little kicks and punches, feeling Jesus moving around, preparing himself for what will come. On top of all of that, Mary and Joseph accomplish so much, despite many odds against them.

            For us, we should take the time to ponder with Mary what it all means.  And it’s not some easy to identify little nugget that we can simply pull out and wrap nicely with a little bow on top.  Because for some of us, Christmas is not the joyous holiday that is sung about in Christmas carols.  We may have come here, we faithful…but joyful and triumphant might not be an accurate statement if we’re totally honest.  For others of us, this truly is a most wonderful time of the year with the kids jingle-belling and being filled with good cheer.  And others of us could probably take it or leave it either way.  It seems that Christmas now is sometimes just as chaotic and unromantic as it was 2000 years ago, even with the poinsettias, the lights, and the trees. 

            But I don’t think that God was going for orderly and romantic when he sent Gabriel to Mary to let her know that she would be the one to bear his son.  Sure, God is the expert at turning chaos into order, but there is the reality of what comes with pregnancy and childbirth…birth plans fly out the window and sometimes you have to settle for a cave because all of the birthing suites are full.  No, I think that when it came to the birth of Jesus, God was going for what is real.  And that meant the king of kings would be born in a cave instead of a palace, that meant that he would be born to peasants instead of royalty, that meant that unnamed and often shunned shepherds would be the first to hear the most wonderful birth announcement, not a royal court of the select elite. 

            And it was all so that whether we see Christmas as a painful time, a joyous time, or an “ehh” time, when we look into the manger there is something there for all of us.  There is the reminder that God is always up to something new and a promise of life and light in the midst of darkness and grief.  There is joy abundant found in the face of a newborn child.  There is an invitation to come and be a part of the mystery of God’s Word becoming flesh in the person of Jesus.  In the face of the newborn Jesus, there is something for each of us to treasure and ponder in our hearts.  That this child was born for you and for me…and that this child would die for you and for me.  The love from which this all came about is indescribable.  But it’s there for you and for me.      

Death, Guns, and God

I was in 10th grade when Columbine happened.  Less than a week after the shootings there, we spent an entire morning sitting on the bleachers of the football field because someone had called in a bomb threat at my high school.

I've since lost count, though someone had posted the number yesterday, of how many school shootings have taken place since April 20, 1999, but it's been far too many.  Even one school shooting is one school shooting too many.

I grew up with the understanding that, for the most part, school was a safe place.  I cannot imagine that this is the case any more.  Now there are schools that require students to pass through a metal detector to get in.  Now there is a greater police presence in schools that I ever remember seeing when I was in school.  Now, places of learning are just as likely to be places of violence (physical and non-physical) and death.  And I grieve over this.

When I heard the news about the shooting in Newtown, CT yesterday, I was waiting for my coffee and food at Dunkin Donuts. I just happened to glance up at the television to see images of the children being escorted from Sandy Hook Elementary school.  And my heart sank as I watched little innocent faces being rescued from what is likely to be the worst day of their lives.  These children are the age of a good chunk of the kiddos that I work with at Trinity...20 of them now robbed of their futures.  And I heard the words of Christ from the cross, crying out in the words of Psalm 22, "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?"

But then I felt a little nudge from the inside...from my unborn child who began a little dance inside my belly.  At 24 weeks of gestation, Jellybean is my constant reminder that death never has the final say, Christ's victory over death and God's wish for us to have life abundant do.  And the words in my head turned from the lament in Psalm 22 to the plea of the song "E'en So, Lord Jesus," by Paul Manz.
       "E'en so, Lord Jesus, quickly come, and night will be no more.  They need no light, nor lamp, nor sun,  
        for Christ will be their all."

In the Christian tradition, our Advent hymns cry out for Christ to come and reconcile us to one another.  "O Come, O Come, Emanuel, and ransom captive Israel, who mourns in lonely exile here, until the Son of God appears.  Rejoice, Rejoice, Emanuel shall come to you, O Israel."  And we cry out to God on behalf of the fallen in Newtown, CT with tears and words of anger, with tears and words of pain and sorrow, with tears and words of lament.  But we do so knowing that though God is always present among us.  God held those who were killed in his arms and comforted them in their last moments. God was with all of those students who huddled in corners and their teachers who calmed their fears by reading them stories, ready to protect them at a moments notice.  God was with the first responders who came to the aid of  Sandy Hook Elementary school.  And God's mercy rests now over the victims and their families, and over the shooter.

And so the question becomes "what now?"  What do we do when innocents are slaughtered by someone who, himself was just a child who suffered from mental illness?  Well first, we keep on praying, we keep on lamenting and mourning.

But we also need to start talking.  We need to have reasonable conversations about ways in which this nation can become safer through gun control laws (Note: I grew up around guns, my husband and I own a gun, I am an admirer of guns, and I respect 2nd amendment rights, to a point).  We need to have healthy conversations about ways in which we can, as a nation, better care for those who suffer from mental illnesses but for whom services have not been as readily available since the 1980's.

There are also somethings that we shouldn't do.  Turning the shooter, a young man with a mental illness, into an evil villain is not helpful. Saying guns don't kill people, people kill people is also not helpful in this incident...there would be 28 people still alive today if Adam Lanza hadn't had access to multiple weapons. Saying God allowed the shooting to happen because we have taken prayer out of schools is probably the least helpful and most harmful thing that could be said in the aftermath of this horrific tragedy (Shame on you, Mike Huckabee).

It is my prayer in these coming days and weeks that we can come together as a nation, forget the labels that divide us, and work to make this nation a safer place for our children.  And I pray that there will be an end to gun violence...an end to all violence in this country and in this world.

May God have mercy upon all of us.