It's Not About Us - Pentecost 8A

Pentecost 8
August 7, 2011
Matthew 14:22-33


This summer at confirmation camp I got the chance to traverse the high ropes course at Camp Tomah Shinga. I made it through the course last year with not much of a problem and this year, after the initial climb up the pole to the course, it seemed like I was going to make it through about the same as last year, if not faster. The belay team had my rope tight, the course was steady, and I raced across the first beam like an experienced acrobat…but then we got to the wire I had to cross…which was not that big of a deal…until the wind picked up. Ah yes, I said to myself, that was a factor I had not thought about since last year there was not much wind. I had seen a couple of the youth become almost paralyzed by these brisk breezes that came through that afternoon, but you never know until you experience it for yourself just how much a strong wind can make you question your trust in a rope and the group of folks that are keeping that rope tight.
So when I was reading this text this week, the first thing to pop into my head was this experience and I thought “oh sure, I know how Peter felt when he was walking on water and the wind picked up.” After all, I had experienced something similar. Peter and I had both been walking somewhere that humans don’t normally walk, trusting in something to keep us going until the breeze picked up and then we started to question what in the world we were doing in our respective positions. Though, when I thought twice about my trust in that rope, I didn’t have that problem of sinking as steel wires and water are two very different things.
And that’s when I realized that maybe it’s not about me and it’s not about Peter in this account from Matthew. Maybe it’s about something more.
It can be so easy for us to make it about Peter, to look at this story and say, look how much faith he had in Jesus that he actually got out of the boat trusting that Jesus would give him the ability to walk on water…but when the wind picked up, he took his eyes off of his savior and that is where he got into trouble…that is when he started to sink. So this is our lesson, to be more like Peter when it comes to getting out of the boat…but at the same time be less like Peter when we’re walking towards Jesus on the water. This is a comforting reading for us who live in an individualistic society, we can put ourselves in Peter’s shoes comforted by the fact that even Jesus’ closest companions messed up a time or two or over and over again. They gave it their all but often times they struck out. And you know, this is not a wrong reading of this text, there are multiple ways of going about it.
But where this can get dangerous is that we might start telling ourselves, oh, if I just had more faith and kept my eyes on Jesus, I wouldn’t be in this financial mess…I wouldn’t have been laid off…if I hadn’t taken my eyes off of Jesus, our marriage wouldn’t have fallen apart…if I had just had more faith, Jimmy would have beaten the cancer…if I had just had more faith…the list goes on and on of ways we could beat ourselves up thinking that we should have had more faith…if we had just kept our eyes on Jesus.
But this is why I think that it may be that Matthew’s account of this story isn’t about Peter and it isn’t about us…it’s about Jesus. You see, we could go on and on about the faith it must have taken Peter to get out of the boat after Jesus tells him to. We could admonish one another to have the courage and faith that it took Peter to get out of the boat. But if you look at the words Peter uses when he addresses Jesus, they are the same as the words that the company of Satan, the high priest and the mockers at the cross use to test Jesus. If it is you…command these stones to turn to bread…confess to us that you are the Messiah, the son of the living God…come down off of that cross and save yourself…command me to come to you on the water.
Poor Peter wants so badly to get it right, but in the process things go horribly wrong and he ends up on the bad end of a good deal. And we do the same thing sometimes…if it is you, Jesus, heal my friend…get my spouse a job…find me my soul mate…reveal the winning lottery numbers to me so I can get out of debt…then I will truly know that it is you and will truly be able to trust you.
The older I get and the more opportunity I have to read about the disciples, the happier I am that Jesus chose who he chose. This was not a first string starting line up…maybe third string or bench warmers…but that’s good because most of us don’t do any better than they did…we try and we try and we put all the effort in that we can but none of us fit that perfect model of discipleship. We mess up, we take our eyes off of Jesus when the winds pick up and we get scared, our trust wanes when storms brew and knock us around like a little life raft in the ocean during a hurricane. We are sinful beings, it is impossible, no matter how hard we try, to keep our eyes on Jesus all the time, it is impossible for us to have the mountain of faith that we so desperately want to have. You know what, though, in the grand scheme of things, that doesn’t matter. We don’t have to be perfect and have an impressive amount of unwavering faith…because it’s not about us…it’s about Jesus.
It’s about the one who came from God to save us from ourselves. It’s about the one who sends us out and then accompanies us on the journey. It’s about the one who comes to us in the middle of the sea ready to reach down his hand and pull us up when we begin to sink and pull us back into the boat. Jesus doesn’t care about the level of faith we have because he knows that we have it through the gift of the Holy Spirit…Jesus himself said that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed we can do great things. Little faith is enough faith for Jesus because it is still faith and because Jesus is the one who had faith enough for us all, who put so much trust in his Father and our Father, that he went to the cross and gave up his life for those of us who struggle along side of Peter and the other 11 disciples. We want to get it right but sometimes we fail and sometimes storms emerge, some that we see and some that are completely unexpected. And when things go awry and when those storms rise up, Jesus is the one who comes to us in them and reaches out his hand to bring us to safety…we might not always recognize it at the time, but regardless that hand is always there ready when we need him.
The most freeing part of a ropes course is the zip line. That’s the part where you put 100% trust in the rope and the line and give up control of what is going to happen in the minute or two that follows. The same freeing experience can be had when we stop worrying about whether we’re good enough and trust 100% that Jesus loves us enough that, even though we might not always recognize it, even though we stand and struggle next to Peter and the other disciples, Jesus will always be there to reach down his hand and pull us up out of the water and back to safety. It’s the letting go that’s up to us.