Do we really need to wait?

I'm someone who thinks that New Years resolutions are over rated. I always make them and then, two weeks later, they have gone by the wayside never to be heard from or seen again.

So instead of resolutions for 2012, I have some health goals I would like to accomplish that I believe would help me to be a better wife, a better pastor...just a better person in general.

My biggest goal has truly been inspired by my adventure on the scale this morning...the "you have got to be kidding me" that came out of my mouth signaled that something really needs to be done...and maybe, just maybe, the next time my Doctor's assistant asks me to step on the scale, she won't give me the funny look she has given me the past two years. So goal #1, get back down to 140 lbs...that's 23 lbs to say goodbye to.
I have made similar goals in the past but never hit them...the only time I was successful in this was when I lived in Tulsa and there was a nice little pond for Abba and I to walk to every evening once things warmed up in the spring. But, there was no plan involved and, sadly, the pond on KU's campus that I know about isn't that pretty...it's actually a bit gross in the spring and summer with all that algae. I do have a plan this time, though...

Step #1 (in progress) - Plan out menus and stick to them.
I do plan weekly menus and do my best to stick to them...but there are those nights (like last night) when cooking just isn't going to happen so off to Chipotle I go for a burrito for Chris and a burrito bowl with only a half scoop of rice for me...they always look at me funny when I say that. (Note: It's not always Chipotle, but you get the picture)

Step #2 (In progress) - only buy what's on my grocery list.
I'm getting really good at this, and it's amazing how much money you save when you do this!! This has been our guarantee that there is little, if any, junk food in the house...and that makes life a LOT easier.

Step #3 (in progress) - Actually eat the fruit and vegetables that I buy.
I've always had this bad habit of buying lots of fruits and vegetables and not eating all of them. I'm the worst with lettuce...sometimes, a girl just wants tomato and cucumber without the inconvenience of chopping lettuce. I do make sure that Chris and I always have a veggie with dinner and I'm working on him to eat a piece of fruit with lunch, but I'm not always successful. So we're getting there...buying flash frozen veggies helps (no canned ones) because then I don't have to worry about them going bad. One thing I have discovered though, I really enjoy pears. I thought I disliked them for a long time, but my senior year of seminary they added a pear and gorgonzola salad to the menu at the restaurant I worked at and I fell in love. (which was my other discovery, I really like weird cheeses).

Step #4 (meh) - Take my vitamins
I hate taking vitamins. I always have. I have tried multiple varieties of multivitamins, flintstones, centrum, one a day, off brand...and they all make me feel sick...they have since I was a kid. A couple years ago, I actually threw up 20 minutes after taking one with my breakfast. Fortunately, my mom is a nurse and she says that all I really need is a B complex with vitamin C and to spend more time outside to get my vitamin D. B complex I can handle, I don't like the taste but it doesn't make me feel sick so I'm good with it. So we're on our way there. Thanks, Mom!!

Step #5 (ugh) - Exercise
I have a treadmill at my house. You think that would encourage me to use it, right? Wrong! I had a gym membership my first year here in Kansas and was 100 times more motivated to get in my car, drive to the gym and work out than I am to walk the 10 feet to my treadmill and walk on it. It's totally backwards logic but it's true. Eventually, I want to start going to the gym again, when we can comfortably afford it. Until then, I'm setting a goal to walk to church a couple times a week...or at least set things up with Chris so that I have to walk home (having only one car makes this a convenient task). Then, I get to stroll down Mass St. then take on the 9th street hill...a 2 mile trip which I can now complete in a mere 35 minutes (it used to take about 50 minutes with that darned hill).

So I guess I'm well on my way with this goal...the only obstacle is the motivation to exercise...but I'm getting there.

My other goals?
More family time
Be nicer to myself
Take more time to be thankful when I find myself getting frustrated or down

What are yours?

My top 10 of 2011

Recently I have come up with a long list of books I want to read, and I have discovered how much more relaxing it is to lie on the couch and read rather than lie on the couch and watch crap TV (not all of it is crap, but a lot of it is)

And so, with my new found excitement, I was going to post a list of the top 10 books I read this year...but I can't remember if I've actually read 10 books this year, and if I have, what all of them are. So here is the list of books I know for sure I read this year (In no particular order)

1) Love Wins by Rob Bell
While I found the format of this book probably better suited for a book on tape rather than an actual book, I really enjoyed Bell's take on salvation. It was no where near an original interpretation, which he admits to in the beginning...but it was one of the most accessible takes on it I have seen.

2) The Street Lawyer by John Grisham
This was my first Grisham novel. (I attempted to read The Chamber in high school but never got very far) but definitely not my last. I couldn't put it down. It was the first thing I wanted to do when I got home for the evening. A fabulous novel about a lawyer who give up his job at a high powered law firm in DC to become a street lawyer, helping the homeless.

3) The Help by Kathryn Stockett
I remember listening to an interview with the author in November 2009 and was intrigued by the concept of this book. It didn't disappoint. I loved it and can't wait to see the movie.

4) Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
Another book I couldn't put down. I read the last 250 pages while waiting for a delayed plane to Chicago. I was actually disappointed that I had finished it so quickly and had to purchase a new book at O'Hare for my trip back to Kansas. Want to see the movie, but don't know if my opinion of the movie will be tainted by the fact that Robert Pattinson plays the main character...we'll see


Books I haven't quite finished yet...

The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brien
I've enjoyed it so far (I think I'm only a chapter in). An interesting look at soldiers in Vietnam according to what they carried with them into battle

The Tiger's Wife by Tea Obreht
I had a really hard time getting into this book, so I'm putting it on hold until I finish the Wicked Series. I like the concept, though, a young woman from Easter Europe trying to put together memories of her recently deceased Grandfather and the circumstances of his death by the means of two stories he used to tell her when she was growing up.

Almost Christian by Kenda Creasy Dean
I loved the first chapter...but things have gotten in the way of being able to finish it. I will put forth extra effort to get this read, I think there are great things in here.

Wicked by Gregory Maguire
I got the series for Christmas from Chris. I'm already almost half way through the first book and I'm loving it. I hope to be done with this book by the end of the week and through the series by the end of January...but this means that at some point, Chris will probably have to take me to see the musical...


Books on my list for 2012 (in addition to the books I currently am in the middle of)
The rest of the Wicked Series
The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks
The Narnia Series (No, I never read this as a kid)
**checks Amazon wish list**
The Hunger Games series
The Time Travelers Wife
Room: A Novel
More John Grisham (the man is prolific!!)
Maybe some of Chris' Tom Clancy novels

I welcome suggestions :)

recapping 2011

This morning I spent about an hour updating my calendar for January 2012, which is only 5 days away, and I got a bit overwhelmed by how quickly my 2012 calendar is filling up (and I don't even have a new desk calendar yet!)

So to combat the overwhelming feelings that came over me this morning...I've decided to take some time and think about some of the awesome things that happened in 2011, the best year of my life so far.

January - Chris and I traveled to Tulsa to witness the marriage of my friends Shannon and Josh, who I set up before leaving my internship there in 2008. It was a beautiful wedding and I was SO glad to see so many of the wonderful people that I was blessed to meet while I served there.

February - I got the opportunity to spend a Sunday morning with the amazing folks at St. Paul's Lutheran Church in Valley Falls, KS, the oldest Lutheran congregation in Kansas. It is a small community of faithful and loving people who welcomed me with open arms.

March - I placed ashes on Chris' forehead on Ash Wednesday and found myself fighting back tears from the power of reminding myself and my future husband that he was dust, and to dust he will return.

April - The folks at Trinity, with the help of the folks at Good Shepherd Lutheran, walked the distance from Lawrence, KS to Jerusalem...and then some!!...during the season of Lent. We got off to a slow start, but as the weather got better, the miles poured in!

May - Got to meet Chris' mom and extended family at his cousin, Jessie's wedding in Chicago. They were very welcoming, it was awesome.

June - What a month! Started with synod assembly (my resolution passed!), followed with an awesome ecumenical VBS with the UCC and Mennonite churches, Confirmation camp came after then and I ended the month with a wedding.

July - Spent a week up in Michigan with family for our wedding shower...later in the month I led a mission trip to Booneville, Arkansas, my favorite mission trip so far! (despite all the car trou...I mean, adventures)

August - Like the rest of this summer, August was a blur...the wedding was getting so close! And we had an adventure with chiggers!

September - We got married!!! Then spent an amazing week in Orlando, Florida (I'm totally ignoring the ER adventure at the end).

October - Got to see some of my favorite people in St. Paul, MN; had our first young family event; met Peter Mayer (lead guitarist for Jimmy Buffett) and Dr. F. Schlingensiepen, a Bonhoeffer scholar who lived through WWII and was successful in avoiding participating in Hitler Youth activities...super cool guy!! (and I'm sure he knows Klaus Peter Adam from LSTC!)

November - Got invited to hang out with some of the kids at their school for "Grandparents/Special friends day" at their school.

December - Got to see my sister-in-law, Megan, for dinner while on a whirlwind trip to Chicago. Sang in the choir for Lessons and Carols. Got to lead the Christmas vespers at one of the assisted living facilities in town. Chris and I had our first Christmas as a married couple.

So much for one year!!
I can't wait to see what 2012 brings...(besides 2 trips to NOLA, deer camp, and Theresa's wedding)

Maybe a trip for the Detroit Lions to the super bowl? (a girl can dream, can't she)

The Manger as a cure for holiday homesickness...

"Pastor, when will you be going home for the holidays?" is a question I hear a lot between Thanksgiving and New Years. "I'm not" is the answer I have given the past three years...though a better answer is probably "I am home" because in reality, Lawrence is home and it has been for the last two and a half years. But for some reason, to not be near the rest of our family this year is harder than is has been the past two years.

Maybe it's because now that Chris and I are married, I want us to be able to share our joy with our families.
Maybe it's because our families are growing with our cousins getting married and having children.
Maybe it's because our grandparents are getting older and I want to get in every last holiday that I can with them.

It's probably a combination of the three with some other stuff thrown in. But my sister, who is a very wise young woman (most of the time, haha), reminded me of something that I mentioned in our text study group a couple weeks ago. We were talking about the traditions related to Christmas worship and why they are important.
Why do we read the same passages every year?
why do we sing the same songs every year?

I argued, and I will argue this until the day I die, that one of the reasons that it is good that we sing the same songs and read the same lessons is that for the people who wander into our doors on Christmas Eve, the manger becomes home.

We live in an ever changing, ever mobile world where people don't always get home for Christmas and so the church has an opportunity to open their doors and welcome people home by offering up readings and songs that people have heard since their childhood, whether it was in church, or at home, or on the radio, the TV or in the movies.

In the incarnation of Jesus as an infant in a manger, God opened his/her arms and created a home for all to come to and be welcomed, whether it is in your home or a home away from home. In hearing Luke 2, in singing Silent Night, you can feel the Holy Spirit at working making the place you are in a home. This is the power of God at work on Christmas. I experienced it 8 years ago in Rome, Italy, in the back of an English speaking Roman Catholic church. Luke 2 was read, Silent Night sung, and I was home for a little bit, because I knew my family was about to do the same thing. It has happened every year I have been away from my family since then. I'm at home in God's embrace in the comfort of the manger.

Taking inspiration and running with it...

It's been another dreary day here in the fair city of Lawrence. The only thing able to cut through the down in the dumps kind of weather is the Christmas lights that so beautifully adorn every tree on Massachusetts Street from 6th St. to 11th St. Like John wrote in the first chapter of his Gospel - "The light shines in the darkness and the darkness did not overcome it." That is true on so many levels, spiritual and otherwise...but mostly spiritual.

As I sit in my office this morning and watch the rain fall outside my window, I have taken inspiration from two of my friends for a reflection. So thanks, Maggie and Kendra!

I've decided to do what I can to make this dreary day a cheery day by making a list of things that I am thankful for (in no particular order):

1) Biological family - I am thankful for the family that gave me birth, raised me and has been so willing to walk with me on all my adventures...or misadventures, as the case may be. I am grateful for the love they've shown me, even though I may not have gotten it at the time (working with youth helps shed some light on this, helps you look at things from a different perspective).

2) Chris - I am so grateful that my husband was so persistent in his quest to make me his bride. I am a better person because of him and I am the happiest woman in the world to have him by my side for the rest of my life for all the adventures that await us. He also makes some pretty amazing chocolate cake.

3) Church family - While I write this, the smells of the monthly workday feast are floating down the hallway, reminding me of how lucky I am to be a part of a church family that comes together so often for some of the best food I've ever had (though, my waistline has something to say about that, too). They're also pretty cool people, too.

4) Abba - Abba saved my life in Oklahoma. Not that I was in any danger of anything, but she put an end to the loneliness of internship. She is the nuttiest dog I have owned and the worst mouse hunter ever, but she's one heck of a funny creature.

5) The Kiefer clan - It's so cool to know that I now have some amazing family around the country, from Chicago to Alaska and beyond. I am grateful to have been so warmly welcomed into the family.

6) Friends - I don't know if I've ever said this out loud, but I have some of the most amazing friends in the entire world. And they're everywhere! Oklahoma, Kansas, Ohio, Minnesota, Wisconsin, California, Michigan, etc, etc, etc. I'm grateful to Facebook the ability to stay connected.

7) My faith - I don't know where I would be right now if I hadn't come out of the faith crisis I had in college. I certainly wouldn't be here in Kansas serving God's people, that's for sure. So I am thankful every day that God found me at just the right time and in the right place (God's really good at that) and that God turned my life upside down and put me on a better path than the one I was on. This is what I am most thankful for.

As Maggie said, it's not the places or the things, it's the people that make life so special (remember, dogs are people too)

And, what do you know, it's time for the workday feast! My favorite day of the month...and it will be followed up by some communion visits this afternoon, then the advent fellowship meal and evening prayer. What a great day!

Questions, comments, concerns...

If you sat with me in math class in 7th and 8th grade at Parcells Middle School in Grosse Pointe Woods, MI, you would recognize that phrase, and probably chuckle a bit. That is how Mr. Ciaravino would end class every day...and as the year progressed, we would join in on the concerns bit. Oh, memories.

This year I began requiring that the confirmation students take sermon notes, one per month. I did this when I was in confirmation and find it a good practice for the youth and it is helpful for my preaching. The last part of the form asks if they have any questions that they would like to ask about God, etc. And they ask the BEST questions. Whether we know it or not, they are thinking about issues regarding faith, but are we giving them the encouragement that they need to voice this?

How can we do better at giving them the groundwork and the vocabulary to speak about their faith, question it, explain their doubts so that when they are in situations in which their faith is tested, they have something to lean on?

“John the Witness”

December 11, 2011
Advent 3B
John 1:6-8, 19-28

In 1970, a musical debuted at Carnegie Mellon University, it was called “Godspell.” Musical was written by Stephen Schwartz and based off of the Gospel of Matthew, with some parables thrown in from Luke. The musical found its way to Broadway and even had a film version made, staring Victor Garber as Jesus. The movie version of the musical begins with a random selection of New Yorkers being visited by a John the Baptist character, who sings “prepare ye the way of the Lord.” After he blows his shofar, a ram’s horn used in the Jewish culture, the group gathers in central park and is baptized in a fountain all the while dancing around the fountain and singing “prepare ye the way of the Lord” aloud for all that could hear. This is not the John that we hear about this morning from the Gospel of John…well in a way it is, but not really.
What I mean by that is this, the John that we find described in the Gospel of John is the same person that we heard about in Mark last week…but John views him in a very different way than Mark, Matthew and Luke do. In Mark, Matthew and Luke, we see meet John the Baptist in the wilderness eating locusts and wild honey, wearing camel’s hair and pretty much looking like a mad man. This John baptizes people for the repentance of their sins, preparing them for the coming of the one greater than he. He is the loud, audacious man with the shofar, baptizing people in a fountain in Central Park, dressed like a circus entertainer. The John that we meet in the Gospel of John, however, is not so much a baptizer as he is a witness. Yes, he baptizes here and there, but that is not his primary function. This John is a much more subdued, humble character who does his work at Bethany, along the Jordan. And he was sent by God to witness to the light that was coming into the world, to the Word become flesh, to Christ.
As we meet John the Witness, we hear an account from him of who he is. “I am not the Messiah.’ And they asked him, ‘What then? Are you Elijah?’ He said, ‘I am not.’ ‘Are you the prophet?’ He answered, ‘No.’ Then they said to him, ‘Who are you?... He said, ‘I am the voice of one crying out in the wilderness, “Make straight the way of the Lord” ’, as the prophet Isaiah said.
With the exception of his last statement about his identity, John responds to those who had been sent to him with the words “I am not.” I am not the messiah, I am not the prophet, I am not Elijah. He identifies himself by stating who he is not, the one who he bore witness to used the opposite tactic, saying “I AM”…and when John does identify who he is, he ties his identity to the one who sent him “I am the voice of one crying out in the wilderness, “make straight the way of the Lord.” And, as much as it is in his power, he is faithful to his calling to be a witness to the Word made flesh, to testify to the light coming into the world.
Soon after his encounter with those sent from the Pharisees, John sees Jesus and says, Look! There he is! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. And again, just a few verses later he repeats this confession of who Jesus is. Behold, the Lamb of God. The witness of John to who Jesus is in the Gospel of John is the earliest witness that is found in the Gospels as to the identity of Jesus as the Son of God. It is John who gives his witness to what happened at the baptism of Jesus when the dove descended upon Jesus and remained upon him. And it is because of the witness of John that many came to believe in who Jesus was.
As we grow ever closer to the Nativity of our Lord, which is just two weeks away, we hear in the call of John the witness a call of our own. A call to be witnesses to the light that has come in to the world and who will come into the world again. A call to testify to the Word made flesh and where we see him at work in the world. We have a call as followers of Christ to join our voices to John the Witness and proclaim “Look! There is the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!” But how do we do that when some are so ready to shut us down at the mere mention of Christmas? How do we testify to the light when for so long it has been seen as the Pastor’s job…? How do we witness to who we are and how we fit into God’s story and Jesus’ story when, quite frankly, it has become an intimidating task? Am I going to say the right thing? Are people going to take my testimony seriously? Will they think less of me because for some reason, I haven’t seen God this week?
There was a study that came out a couple years ago, called the National Study of Youth and Religion, that became the basis of a book called “Almost Christian.” The study was aimed at talking with teenagers about their faith, or lack thereof, and their feelings toward the church. The study found that while a majority of teenagers they spoke to claimed that they were people of faith and had positive feelings about the church, most of were also very apathetic to the practices of their faith tradition. The small percentage who were not apathetic towards religious practices had a powerful story to tell about their faith and came from faith communities that had a very strong sense of mission that challenged these youth to think outside of themselves. This study has led to the claim that Christianity as a victim to “moralistic therapeutic deism,” a belief in a higher power that we call upon occasionally when we get in trouble and who helps us to feel better about ourselves, but demands little from us in return. There really is no unique vocabulary with which to voice this belief, and it is a belief system that fails to challenge us into deeper faith. And it is something that we, the church, have passed down to the youth of the church after years of missional understanding and teaching being watered down. But it doesn’t have to stay that way…we have some unlearning to do as a church, though.
We have been called by virtue of our baptism, to join our voices with John the witness to testify to where we see the light of Christ shining in the world. We are called to be witness to who the light is. Now, I’m not saying lets all go down to Mass Street and stay there until we have convinced all of Lawrence who Christ is…as exciting as that might seem. But let’s take the time to share with each other our God moments, the times and places in which we have seen God at work, in which we have seen the light shine in the darkness. Spend some time at the dinner table talking to your spouses and friends and children about your faith, about questions and concerns, and pray with each other about them.
God sent John into the world to testify to the light that was coming into the world. God did that to get the attention of humans around John that something wonderful was coming into the world, a light that would shatter the darkness for good. The Word of God was becoming flesh in order to redeem us, to save us from ourselves.
God has called us to the same task, that we may be stirred up by the Word of God and go out into the world and bear witness to Christ, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. It’s not just an Advent thing, it’s a lifelong practice…so let’s get practicing!